Before we start, open a notebook and put down some universal truths, preferably in capital letters:

Frank confession is the shortest way to the dock.

Every signature increases your term of detention.

Dogs are loved for wagging their tails, not tongues.

The list can be endless. These things have been known since time immemorial. Even a fool understands: the less he talks the sooner he can be free again. However, there is no harm in reminding you an old adage: speaking is silver, silence is gold.

May I suggest one more exercise? Look at the window of your cell and count the number of squares the bars divide it into. Have you done it? Now you know how many more years in prison you can get for just one careless word.

So you are at the interrogation. The door opens and shuts every now and then, cops from the operation department run in and out of the room. More and more new faces appear drawn either by curiosity or desire to impress you by the number of cops involved.

- Over three hundred investigators work on your case! Confess! - shouts the ‘wicked’ cop while the ‘kind’ one nods sympathetically and offers you a piece of sausage and a slightly rotten tomato. You try to make out how many more investigators, not involved in your case, are left to fight the crime.

All cops are notable for their stupid obstinacy, enviable slow wits and identical phraseology. At the beginning of the interrogation they playfully unbutton their leather jackets saying:

- Shall we talk? See, I don’t have a dictaphone. You can check yourself.

And peering into your eyes ingratiatingly:

- We don’t interrogate here. We just talk.

There is no use feeling their pockets: they really have no dictaphones. What for? You are in a small room with cheap wallpaper and shabby furniture. However, it is packed with video and audio recorders so densely that even flies on the ceiling don’t feel comfortable. Remember: the main task of the interrogators is to get as much information out of you as possible. Later on this information will be tailored by investigators to suit their needs.

Such ‘discussions’ last for 10-15 hours non-stop making your associates on the other side of bars terribly nervous.

- How are things over there? - Your associates crane their necks like ostriches grasping every word of the one who has just returned from the police station. The scout brushes away drops of sweat from his forehead:

- He has been interrogated for eight hours now.

Dead silence falls, bordering on panic. “What has he told them?’ everyone wonders.

- Something has to be done.

- Sure.

All agree and lapse into silence again. Everybody thinks over the ways of your salvation. Finally the most cardinal option is suggested:

- Maybe we should try poisoning? Potassium cyanide?

The suggestion comes from one of your best friends.

- How shall we put it into his food? - Another friend says pensively.

A simple thought doesn’t occur to anyone: what if you, like a bronze statue opposite the University, persist in keeping sullen silence? What if for you death is better than Judas life? It is only later, when you are free again, that your friends will shake your hand in admiration: “Well done, guy! None of us had a slightest doubt about you.’

It will only be later, but now they think where to get potassium cyanide.

When in prison I once shared a cell with a very nice company involved in theft and robbery. They were a professional gang, always covered their tracks, never left any evidence. Everything went well until one of them suspected a leak of information. In panic they started accusing each other and soon funeral march had to be played practically every day. In all the mess none of them thought about securing against police that always pokes its nose into everything.

As a result, those who were still alive ended up in prison where they were finally reconciled as if it couldn’t have been done outside prison.

The story made me conclude the following: in order to live in peace people need to have some common enemy. When they have it everything is OK, but if they don’t they start finding faults with one another.

Generally speaking all suspects regardless of their criminal case can be divided in two groups. The first unites people who at the slightest threat of arrest disappear to the other end of the planet. The second, on the contrary, gets together outside police headquarters building where the interrogation of their buddy is under way and starts shouting: “Hold your mud!” The only thing that saves them from being arrested is very slow thinking ability of the cops.

When the crowd outside becomes too noisy the interrogator shuts the window with irritation and angrily asks the arrested:

- So who else was in the same gang with you?

You still persist demanding a meeting with the investigator in the presence of a lawyer. According to the Law you have the right not to speak with the interrogators at all. Do so and it will be your best decision. Remember: you don’t have to tell the cops anything under any circumstances. Even the color of your socks should remain a secret. When they fail to make you confess using pressure they will try a different method - asking all kinds of indirect questions. Any conversations that might seem to have nothing in common with your case, like religion or eating habits, are used for the purpose of getting you to talk and try to trap you.

Suddenly the door opens and an important looking man briskly enters the room. He is introduced as an investigator who deals with particularly important cases. He is ‘shocked’ to learn that in prison people under investigation are beaten, denied food, water and even relieving nature.

- It can’t be true! Things like that?! Here? I’ll check and sort everything out! - His indignation is very sincere.

You are taken aback, aren’t you? Don’t let him make a fool of yourself. Insist on having a lawyer, and the one you want, not the one offered by the cops.

The investigator smiles slyly and screwing up his eyes says:

- We’ll interrogate you as a witness. And it is in full compliance with the Law to interrogate a witness without a lawyer. In case you refuse to answer my questions I’ll have to institute criminal proceedings against you.

You can feel clouds gathering over your head. Don’t panic. Let him interrogate you. And keep in mind the following: only the first interrogation of a witness is allowed without a lawyer, all the subsequent ones should only be in the presence of a lawyer.

Take your time answering the questions. Tell them your name, address, place of birth, etc. - things they already know. Add a few words about your social and marital status but don’t overdo it. Insist on their putting into your interrogation record an important phrase: “Has been insisting on having a lawyer from the moment of detention.” That’s it. Nothing else should escape your mouth.

You can talk about anything apart from what might interest the investigation. Their interest can only result in your imprisonment or financial damage. If the investigator is happy and sends for a beer - it means you have blurted out too much. But if he is gloomy and nervous - you are doing fine. Dragging out the time is the best thing for you to do. Complain that you are tired, have a headache, feel sleepy, need a medical examination, etc. Ask the permission to go to the bathroom and stay there for an hour. I know it’s not the best place to stay but still better than in the same room with the cops. Promise you will tell more tomorrow.

I once spent half a day with the investigator discussing the best way to put in the record the phrase: ‘I absolutely deny my guilt’.

- Can’t you admit at least part of it? - the investigator kept asking showing me the photo where I was together with some people I hardly knew but whom he called ‘inveterate criminals’.

- How can you deny knowing them if you are sitting together? What were you discussing? - persisted the investigator.

How could I explain to him that my presence there was absolutely incidental?

- Who told you I deny knowing them?

His face started breaking into a smile. He took out a pen preparing to write down the long-awaited confession.

- I don’t deny anything but I don’t admit anything either. I have the right to keep silent and don’t have to prove my innocence. If necessary I am prepared to explain everything in court in the presence of mass media.

- You dare!

The investigator was obviously annoyed. He put the photo back into his breast pocket and shook his finger at my face:

- You are asking for trouble!

I was already in trouble. I watched him thinking that any evidence was a denial and any denial was an evidence. I still can’t understand why such an unimportant old photo found during the search at somebody’s home seemed so important to the investigation.

Generally speaking, investigators from the Public Prosecutor’s Office are smarter than those from the police investigation department. However, they are at the same time much more insidious than their counterparts, always ready with some new mean tricks. Never expect the interrogation to be short. On the contrary, it most likely will take almost a whole day. They will persistently ask you the same questions again and again. Sometimes they won’t let you sleep for a few days so that you lose control and blurt out something undesired. Try to remain calm no matter what happens. Remember: only the one who doesn’t talk gives nothing away.

I can’t help saying a few words about the cops from the Criminal Investigation Department (CID). Watching them at the interrogations I divided them into three groups.

1. Beginners. They feel very uneasy, keep fidgeting uncomfortably, trying to get used to the surroundings. They haven’t made up their minds yet if they want to stay or look for another job. Most of them, once they’ve seen police from the inside, quit and are reluctant even to mention the fact that they have had such an experience.
2. Medium-level personnel. Using the army language they are no longer soldiers but not sergeants yet. These will do anything to please their chiefs. For them being a police officer is the only chance to demonstrate their own importance to the surrounding world.
3. Police chiefs and their hangers-on. They are advanced in years medium-level personnel who start looking for something profitable to do after retirement. One of them when we were left alone began complaining about his hard life and asked me for a job. The other went even further:

The level of intellect and ethics in the police is very low. And it’s not surprising. The head of CID, for example, is a well-known bribe-taker and bisexual. Street whores call him Valentin, while fags prefer a more gentle name - Valyusha. Authorities know his background but don’t seem to mind. Probably they find it easier to manipulate the man when he is far from being perfect.

At the interrogations Valentin’s assistant was the loudest shouting at me demanding confessions. However, when for a few minutes we were left alone, he suddenly passed regards from my friends in the world of sport and then quickly whispered into my ear: “Hold on. We have nothing against you.’ A minute later, when his chief with other assistants were back, he immediately went on with his threats:

- We have irrefutable evidence against you! You’ll get a death sentence!

I knew they had nothing but still was grateful. Breathing became easier.

For you to be better prepared for interrogations I’ll dwell upon some traditional methods used by the cops.

Bullying. It includes rough blackmail as well as all kinds of physical and psychological threats. Cops go out of their way to discredit a prisoner in the eyes of his relatives and colleagues to minimize help from the outside. The method is quite effective especially with intellectuals and weak-willed people. They usually say afterwards: ‘I confessed everything to save my family’. It is a cheap excuse to justify one’s own cowardice.

Torture. Intimidating is usually combined with torture to prove that no joking is meant. Cops seem to enjoy this method most and don’t even try to hide it. The point is to break the prisoner’s will and make him do whatever he is told.

Most people are scared of pain. Terrified. They start confessing after their fingers have been put in the doorway or subjected to high-tension current. The less you are afraid of pain in general the more difficult it is to get something out of you. One of the well-known ways to overcome pain is to think of yourself as a masochist who enjoys pain.

There are also a number of meditation exercises that can help ease pain. I have met people who learned to quit their own bodies while they were badly beaten with clubs and bats.

You should always be prepared for the worst. Nothing should take you unawares. Every interrogation may mean torture so better have some tricks prepared beforehand to help you endure it. Professionals have their own methods, but if you are still a fresher strong feelings might be helpful. Such as hatred or love, they are able to block pain.

From my own experience the most painful tortures are the ones prolonged in time. I clearly remember the night of my arrest. I was thrown on the stone floor of the prison’s basement with my hands and feet cuffed behind my back and left there for hours.

The first forty minutes were unbearable. Sharp pain like burning hot lead spread all over my body filling every cell, every drop of blood. I was suffocating, each breath seemed the last one. And then when I was on the verge of despair all of a sudden the pain rushed back like an ocean wave. At first I couldn’t understand what had happened. But soon I realized what had caused the change: my body grew so numb that it lost any sensation. I felt very light, almost weightless, and looked at myself as if from aside, soaring high above. It was an unforgettable feeling of boundless freedom. My consciousness was surprisingly clear and serene, I could hear my heart beating. It was so loud that seemed to be heard for thousands of kilometers.

Some time later the cops came and started beating my body with their boots and clubs. I felt like laughing and couldn’t suppress a smile.

- Look, he is laughing at us!

Infuriated, they doubled their efforts. Torturing people is their professional duty but they were not good at it. Nothing to be surprised at: simple though it may seem, this function still requires certain intellect which they have none. Exhausted and disappointed, the cops left murmuring something about my strong will. They didn’t realize that my will had nothing to do with it. I really didn’t feel anything. They could have been hitting the wall - the effect would have been the same.

The following morning, before taking me out for an interrogation the cops took the hand-cuffs off my hands and ankles. I returned back to earth again I will never forget the sensation of life slowly returning to my numb body that had been motionless for sixteen hours. Patience? Strong will? You must be kidding. I still wonder how I managed to stand that pain and not go insane. That was just the right time for the cops to ask their questions. But thanks God I was left alone. When it was time to go I could move and was in full control of myself again.

Playing off one against another. There is nothing worse than unconformity in actions between the suspects. One of the unwritten prison laws is never try to put the blame on others. Even if trying to save their necks they tell lies and give evidence against you. Even though animal fury gets hold of you, don’t say a word, clench your teeth. In the end everyone will pay his bill.

This unwritten rule is not so much a moral obligation as it may first seem. It’s more a matter of calculation. Much too often suspects in the effort to shield themselves put all the blame on their former friends. As a result, everyone involved finds himself in shit up to his ears. Later the smarter ones heroically refuse their previous evidence and feel very proud of being so brave. ‘First betray everyone, then refuse everything’ is a typical situation in prison.

Interrogators try their best to play off one suspect against another. ‘Everyone has already confessed,’ - they would tell you. - ‘If you continue to persist we’ll make you a scapegoat.’ Or trying to worm themselves into your confidence: ‘Your former friends blame everything on you, they betrayed you! But we can see you are a nice guy who is here by mere accident We are eager to help you but you don’t seem to trust us. Tell us everything and we’ll let you go.’ Nothing can be more trite but I have seen people who swallowed the bait.

Quite often interrogators deliberately lie about other suspects to cause your indignation and desire to take vengeance. In a moment’s weakness you tell them everything. Your words are passed over to your former friends who are outraged and tell more about you not realizing that by doing so they sign their own sentence.

Bluffing. At the interrogation the investigator often pretends that he knows everything and there is no use hiding anything from him.

- Take my advice: give yourself up. It’s for your own benefit.

You already know what a frank confession usually leads to. Remember: they don’t know anything, they can only guess which is far from true evidence. Cops like to juggle with facts, confuse truth with lies and claim their guess-work to be proved facts. To make you speak cops try to flabbergast you by letting you know all they have against you. However, they don’t usually have much. Besides, they are always pressed for time. And there is also fear that their smarter colleagues will sell you or your friends all the evidence they have.

It is an extremely rare case to have a really smart investigator who will let you know the facts one by one revealing them like cards in a card game. Such method is very effective but using it is only possible when you are approachable and participate in the conversation. In case you keep silent staring absent-mindedly at the wall no method bears any fruit.

The simple truth is that most people are not betrayed by the others, they give up themselves. Remember: you are being watched all the time. The moment you relax, they begin pressing you. The less you are able to hide your thoughts and feelings the more vulnerable you are.

“Your motherland has given you everything: good upbringing, education, medical treatment. And you turned out to be so ungrateful and refuse to help the investigation”, - such admonitions are supposed to appeal to your decency and civic duty. Nothing is more primitive than such a trick but it also has its victims.

“Let’s make a deal”. Cops promise to let you go if you defame somebody else. But that same person is offered exactly the same thing. So don’t expect to buy your freedom this way.

Using drugs. Accept my condolences if your suspect is a drugs user. Mass media try to persuade us that drug addicts are full members of society, they only require medical treatment. Maybe it’s true, but from what I have seen they cause so much trouble that I can hardly call them human.

Drug addicts are prepared to tell anything in exchange for a doze. They admit whatever they are asked even though they have nothing to do with it. They are always a pleasant surprise for the cops as they make wonderful informers and false witnesses.

Cops often use drugs during so called ‘discussions’ and interrogations. However, if you are not on drugs and detained for the first time, they will hardly dare to get you on drugs. First they’ll try to find out your attitude towards drugs. Usually it happens this way: one of your cell-mates happens to have some grass and offers to share it with you to relieve the strain. If you accept, be sure cops will try to use the same trick at the interrogation.

Before giving drugs to a prisoner cops study his file carefully paying special attention to the following details:

- social status of a person;

- if he has ever used drugs before; if he has, what drugs and for how long;

- if a person has had previous convictions.

Cops are sure that if he had he inevitably tried drugs. Besides, there is

less responsibility for them in case such prisoner is overdosed - he

has already discredited himself in the eyes of the society and nobody

is likely to stand up for him.

Swing. To get the necessary information out of a prisoner cops first try ‘to swing’ him by talking about his family, friends or work; they may even ask his advice in a matter he knows professionally. Cops aim at winning your sympathy and confidence, try to make you yielding and talkative. This is usually done by a ‘good’ cop while the ‘bad’ one shouts, threatens, abuses and humiliates you. An old trick of threats and bribery.

Experience shows that people’s problems are usually caused by themselves. In ninety-five cases out of a hundred people themselves admit their guilt either fully or partially (which as you already know makes no difference to the judge). And only in five remaining cases the guilt is proved by the investigation. If a person doesn’t talk much, never admits anything, and keeps denying his guilt - he is never detained for long even if there is direct evidence against him.

I repeat once more: when it comes to passing a sentence there is no difference between phrases: ‘I fully admit my guilt’ and ‘I partially admit my guilt’. A woman can’t be a bit pregnant. You are either guilty or not guilty. The word ‘partially’ is used to make a prisoner start admitting things and gradually make him really guilty. Be on the alert all the time and yield to no provocations. And stop getting panicky every time you see the investigators. They have better reasons to be afraid of you. Pity you can’t take a detached view of your ‘discussions’ with them. You could have a good laugh if there wasn’t a chance for you to get a death sentence.

I wonder why the phrase ‘I am not guilty’ is treated as an insult by the cops. There is nothing wrong in it. Or maybe they just treat everyone under investigation as an inveterate offender?

Sooner or later, in probably a week’s time since your detention lawyers hired by your relatives will break through to you. You’ll be surprised to learn that life hasn’t stopped after your sudden disappearance. It still goes on. The sun continues to shine in the blue sky. Children go to school in the morning and the nearest bakery still opens at 8 a.m. While you are eating an apple - you have never realized apples can be so delicious! - the lawyers will explain your rights to you.

You will be shocked to find out that this country has a Constitution and in accordance with it nobody has the right to burst into your home. You have the right not to answer personal questions. Have you ever heard of presumption of innocence? I know that this modest girl is not a very frequent guest at the court building but it does exist and every disputable question should be resolved in the defendant’s favor.

I remember a big slogan that was put up on the wall in my school: ‘Knowledge is your strength!’ How very true! The more you know the less secure cops feel with you because what they are most afraid of is the Law they are supposed to uphold. Cops feel much more at ease with those who are ignorant. It is easy to persuade them that everything is done in full compliance with the Law.

Lawyers came and left. We stayed. In smelly concrete coffins. Face to face with smirking mongrels endowed with power. I can see you are depressed after the interrogation. Bear in mind: the less you listen to whatever cops say the better you sleep at night. Another universal truth: believing cops is deceiving yourself.

Have they told you that all your relatives are under arrest? Have you yourself seen them hand-cuffed? No? Then forget about it. Tomorrow they will tell you the whole population of Ukraine is under arrest. Take it easy. Think of something positive: you are still alive and there is still hope for you to get out of here. Want a riddle? During a river crossing a boat with ten cops turned over. How many of them were drowned?

- Shit won’t drown.

- Wrong. Twenty! Another ten died during the investigation experiment.